Keep in mind these medications work well for some but not for others, depending on a variety of complex factors. People often feel frustrated with conflicting medical advice, and sometimes it can feel like you are a human guinea pig. Also, if you are having a hard time with the overall philosophy of traditional support groups you should be aware that more that other alternatives exist. Check out SmartRecovery.org, CelebrateRecovery.com, or go online and look for support group options in your area. Yes, transitional living will mean more expenses and it might upset your family. But with a little research, there are often many affordable options.
- They also happened to be started by white, Christian, males.
- The other people next to you at group therapy sessions and support group meetings all have experiences that can help you.
- Then, go into whatever room you drank in and rearrange the furniture.
- But each element is unique to every one of us.
- There is nothing more embarrassing than a bunch of 30, 40, or 50-somethings behaving like they are 20-something.
Learn HOW to feel better in sobriety. If you’re starting from zero and struggling to find something positive about yourself to genuinely believe, I recommend forgetting about yourself for a minute and think of others. Sobriety can’t vanquish all shameful memories from your brain, but it can teach you how to handle them. Negative emotions are part of the human experience, my friend. Additionally, there are online support networks that can help steer you in the right direction. We’ve got a fabulous private Facebook group for Soberish that you are welcome to join. That’s why having support systems in place is so critical to your success.
Sobriety Sabotage Surrounding Yourself with Temptation
Your unadulterated consciousness may come as an unpleasant surprise to you. I was horrified by what a needy and nervy dork I was. It had been nice pretending to be relaxed and laidback for a few hours every day.
We can connect and learn from reading their writing, chatting online or just following their examples. Read, learn, educate yourself and discover what will be best for you, because only YOU will live your life.
How Long Does Cocaine Stay in Your System?
I lose fifteen pounds and nothing in my closet fits anymore. That’s exactly how I feel every time I leave the house. It’s hard to face that stuff when you’re newly sober and it has hurled a lot of strong, well-intending people back into relapse. But if you know it’s coming, you can plan for it and increase your odds of getting through it. There are millions of other people in recovery, all at different stages, and many are having a bad day just like you are. There is a lot of stuff to process as you build your life in recovery every day, and that isn’t always going to be easy. Be advised—a lot of people manage stress and craving early in recovery by eating lots of carbs and fatty comfort foods.
- I am forever grateful and will keep all the staff and peers in my prayers and heart.
- I’m not embarrassed to tell you my full name.
- It’s the connection and being able to feel the love and having a place to be of service.
- None of the steps ask you to do this.
- You don’t feel defined by your past as strongly.
Also, beer helped me to socialize in groups when it turns out I didn’t actually really enjoy that. Life has improved ten times over since I quit drinking, and it feels a lot less boring since I stopped spending whole weekends at the pub. I have more time to focus on my relationships and hobbies and projects, and no longer feel restless, irritable or discontent so much of the time. Now I’m almost five years sober, the idea of not drinking being boring is laughable. But I still remember the agonizing boredom of early sobriety. When I suddenly had so much more time and no clue what to do with it. In those early days, the whole experience of not drinking sometimes felt like an unbelievable drag.
Why Is Early Sobriety So Boring?
I had so much guilt and remorse that making her do something that she didn’t want to wasn’t something I was capable of. It’s my biggest regret–one that I think will never go away.
I lied to try and keep up appearances, to avoid rejection, and to tamp down my guilt and shame. But we don’t just lie to others, we also lie to ourselves.
Contact Your First Step’s National Hotline
And I want to be clear about that because it was the first mistake I made in this series of decisions. I was going to hang out with people who didn’t care about me- we weren’t friends, they didn’t care about my best interests, right? I didn’t know anything about AA, all I knew was that was where people went when they didn’t want to drink anymore, and I needed to be a person who didn’t drink anymore. I had no direction or guidance, but I had a desire to be a sober person. As you know, I had a lot of challenges when I got sober. I was physically broken from my car accident, I had no money and all my bills were due, and I had a ton of legal trouble hanging over my head. If I didn’t have that space to talk to you guys and ask questions and have fun- I don’t know if I would have survived the loneliness of just recording podcasts and posting them.
They help keep everything fresh for me. Those of us who have been in recovery for a while need to be reminded where we came from and why we don’t want to go back there. It’s also an opportunity for us to offer our experience, strength, and hope to other alcoholics. You recite the same words to them before they’ve even finished, because the thing about drunks is they don’t just repeat themselves in one night, but over and over and over again. It is so tedious, and the resentment feels punishing, because it is, because this is a choice you made. And now it’s up to you to stop making it. I read book after book about mindset, spiritual approaches to sobriety, and connecting to my shadow side.
I was so angry at myself, I was so distraught and humiliated and scared to death. But I let some people talk me into going out that Friday night. We had bought concert tickets several weeks before, obviously having no idea I was going to crash and quit drinking- and they wanted me to still go to the concert. Listen, I love you guys- I’m not going to sugarcoat anything, I’m going https://ecosoberhouse.com/ to be honest with you- building sustainable sobriety takes hard work and consistency. And I know in the beginning it’s not super fun, it feels hard, you don’t know exactly what to do, and you are spinning your wheels. If you are sitting in early sobriety or in a rut in your recovery, this is the conversation for you. There are so many things that are out of our control.
When we live in denial and unacceptance, we can’t grow and heal, and that makes sobriety even harder than it already is. It makes us sobriety sucks feel stuck and unable to move. But when we live in acceptance, we are better able to stay sober, live happily, and be fulfilled.